Chris Thompson

A Miserable Shitehawk Production
A Miserable Shitehawk Production
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Basketball Podcaster Is Upset About Your Priorities

Look. The social media infatuation with Nick Young is stupid, insulting, and borderline cruel. The hoisting and prodding and applauding of Nick Young is not different from the upperclassmen at a kegger chanting some dipshit freshman’s name while the stupid idiot chugs what everyone knows to be much more alcohol than he can handle. The whole point of it is so everyone else can point and laugh at a joke whose punchline is a person, one who may only be, at best, partially aware of his role. Which, gross.

So, right, that’s something you should stop doing. Stop the ironic celebration of his romantic relationship with joke person Iggy Azalea. Stop the performative lifting of his brand of basketball, which is a dreary retread of the soul-darkening style of the late-90s, rendered poorly by a poorly rendered automaton stuffed into a clown suit. Knock it off. Nick Young is a mess, and he has become the butt of a long-running joke, and if he’s too addled and far-gone to appreciate this, that shouldn’t make it any less depressing.


Here are some things you could do instead: you could lavish attention on, say, good basketball players, who also happen to have interesting styles that arise from being whole and interesting people, like Russell Westbrook or James Harden; you could spend your social media time and surplus enthusiasm making lower-case Weird Twitter jokes; you could make Vines of your dog playing instruments. Or, here, let Grantland’s Zach Lowe tell you what you should be doing:

“I hate to be the cranky old man, but the social media phenomenon that is Nick Young makes me angry. It just annoys me because, like, if we devoted the amount of time we spend making fun or, like, trumpeting how hilarious Nick Young is to, like, donating a little money to Syrian refugees or something, the world would b—”


Whoa, Imma stop you right there, chief. Maybe, hmm...maybe if people were only spending as much time faux worshiping Nick Young as it would take to donate some money—which is to say, roughly one minute—there wouldn’t be very much to gripe about! Also, not for nothing, but compared to a refugee crisis in Syria, lots of things are small and stupid and unworthy of our attention. Like, say, the career arc of Anthony Bennett, or maybe a comprehensive ranking of NBA official logos. Know what I mean?

You should make space in your life to do things that are good for humanity! And you should also make other space in your life for things that are fun. But, like, just spend that time a little more wisely than making an ironic idol out of a terrible and embarrassing and possibly delusional NBA guy. OK. Good talk.

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